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The Old Man And The Young Gunslinger – A Parable:

Written by Wellness Club on July 10, 2008 – 1:25 pm -

Dr. Myatt (Dana) and her Dad have a special relationship.

Dad is 90 (and still going strong), Dr. Myatt is 49 (ditto about the going strong). And they have great fun — and tease each other — about the "age thing."

Dad calls Dana "The Pepsi Generation."
She calls Dad "The Geritol Generation."
The conversations might go something like this:

Dad (on a phone call): "Hi. How’s the Pepsi Generation?"
Dana: "Fine Dad. How’s the Geritol Generation?"
(Dr. Myatt notes that soon they will BOTH be in the "Geritol Generation" and this greeting will no longer be valid).

Or, Dad calls Dana on her 49th birthday and asks:

Dad: "How does it feel to be 49?"
Dana: "Great. How does it feel to be the Dad of a 49-year-old?"

Dad celebrated his 90th B-day in May (Memorial Day, fitting for an "Old Salt" — retired Navy for those who don’t know the expression).

Dana was quick to point out "Dad, 90 isn’t old … if you’re a Redwood!"

Yes, Dr. Myatt and her Dad (and Mom, too!) have a special relationship. As she’s quick to say, she give thanks to the Almighty every day that both of her parents are still alive and well and in her life.

SO… in that happy vein, she sent this email to Dad this morning:
(Dad got a computer at the venerable age of 80, and 10 years later, he’s an e-mailin’ wizard),


An old prospector walked his tired old mule into a western town one day. He’d been out in the desert for about six months without a drop of whiskey.

He tied his old mule to the hitch rail the first saloon he came to. As he stood there brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger burst out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, "Hey old man, have you ever danced?"

The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No, I never did dance. I just never wanted to."

A crowd had gathered by then and the gunslinger said, "Well, you old fool, you’re gonna’ dance now," and started shooting at the old man’s feet. The old prospector was hopping around and everybody was laughing.

When the gunslinger fired his last bullet, he holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.

The old man reached up on the mule, drew his shotgun, and pulled both hammers back making that unmistakable double clicking sound. The gunslinger heard the sound and everything got quiet. The crowd watched as the gunslinger slowly turned around, looking down both barrels of the shotgun.

The old man asked, "Did you ever kiss a mule’s ass?"

The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No. But I’ve always wanted to."

The lessons from this story are:

  1. Don’t waste ammunition.
  2. Don’t mess with old people.
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