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Ewww… Another Case Of Paraprosdokian

Written by Wellness Club on April 7, 2011 – 3:52 pm -

Ewww… Another Case Of Paraprosdokian

 

By Nurse Mark

 

Ok, Now that I have your attention…

 

We examined the paraprosdokian with some examples in a recent issue of HealthBeat News, and it was a popular article – lots of folks got a chuckle from the article and wrote to say so.

A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect.

Here are some more – have fun with them!

  • How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
  • I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted paycheques.
  • Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says “If an emergency, notify:” I put “DOCTOR.”
  • I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
  • Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
  • Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy.
  • Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?
  • Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
  • A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
  • You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
  • The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
  • Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
  • A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip
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